Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Midlife Shuffle


Lately I have been thinking about my particular age, and where it fits into human development literature. And I really believe the mid-fifties are completely left out. It seems to jump from adulthood to late adulthood. Yet, I sense this time to be of great importance. I, for one, am going through as big a restructure in identity as I did in my twenties. What about you? 

23 comments:

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Oh, I agree!!! That's why we bought a campground. Maybe it wasn't my greatest idea, but I wasn't content doing what we were doing, so....

Reya Mellicker said...

You know I'm on this same wavelength, definitely! Just today I was marveling at the fact that I've reconnected with a couple of good friends from high school (who I haven't seen since high school). I feel like we've been given the gift of friendship again in order to help each other through this bizarre time of life.

It's rich and fabulous ... and weird! Glad to be moving through it with you, too!

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

I agree totally about being 50. Several years ago, we moved back to my hometown just to be closer to family. Now I swore at the tender age of 18 when I flew the coop that I would NEVER come back here. It seems like you almost want to reconnect with everything. As Reya said...it's bizzare! I found your blog through Chic Geeks awards...great read!

TheChicGeek said...

I agree. I turned 50 this year...seems so weird. Everyone is always shocked when I tell them my age...they don't think I look it...Yeah!...I lead a healthy lifestyle.
Aside from the superficial stuff of getting older I actually really love it. I think being older you are more settled in life, all those hard lessons do pay off, and for me, and actually others I know, I find myself very free to just be me. I'm confident in expressing myself and I'm very open to new adventures. I feel excited like a teenager again. Partly, the kids are grown up so I don't worry about them any more so much, I just do what I like to do and it's fun to rediscover yourself, the same as younger, only much, much better :)
Nice post theme. I like it!
Have a Happy Day!

Andrea said...

I was just thinking about this today on my ridge home from work. There seems to be a certain calmness in my fifties that I never had before. The things that once made me scream and shout no longer get to me. Maybe it's a just a decrease in energy, but I'm hoping it's a kind of maturity.

Auctions West Coast said...

I have just turned 50, about to become a grandmother in a couple of months. I feel so much more at peace, seem to have more control over my life and also have some wonderful quiet expectations. Loving rereading Shakespear and mining for all the golden nuggets hidden in his works. Life is good, I see all the 50 year old trees budding and know at this age we can bloom way more now than when we were in our youth!

Jill of All Trades said...

Oh man am I with you. I have been going through that too this past year, especially with the loss of my dear friend and mother and my hubby's near death experience. Shook my world up.

Auctions West Coast said...

concerning loss of loved ones, I like to feel that they are still around just in another form. When we burn some of our pruned trees,the elements change the branches become smoke and ash nothing disapears the branches have just changed into different elements giving life to who knows what. All is well.

Z said...

I agree!!1

Bilal Malik said...

well i m still in twenties so cant really say anythin but i definately want to know how it goes for u

Akmad Toshiro said...

yeah, i'm same like Bilal Malik..i'm still 21, and not much thing that i can say, but..this the time for me to create a story for tomorrow..:)

ellen abbott said...

Yes, 50. My self image changed also. The face I was seeing in the mirror didn't match the one in my head. I also let go of a lot of BS. I was finally of the age where I could focus on myself. My kids were grown, my father dead and my mother cared for. Being 50 was liberating. I will be 59 this year, on the verge of the 60s, curious as to what the next 10 years will bring.

rockhopper said...

Yep an interesting time the fifties. I've just turned 54 and I definitely feel that time is going by so fast and most of that time is spent working too hard.
I want to live a bit out of the system and free before I get too old to do the kind of stuff that makes me feel alive. When I was in my twenties I felt immortal, after taking a few hits I now know that I am not and that each day is precious.
Take care and enjoy life.
I wish you well.
Dave.

PeacefulWmn9 said...

I, too, am transitioning for the better. I do believe, at 58, this decade has been better, easier for me than the forties.

Karen

Lynne P. Alexander Hollingsworth said...

I think I am going through a much bigger adjustment than in my twenties. Life now, at 59 is unbelievably free from self consciousness and self centeredness (if indeed there ever was any of hat) and life is so 'in the moment' as you so perfectly put it. In the moment is all there really is! We have to live some years and some pain, I think, to learn this basic fact of life. It is the best time of life, right now. If your daughter can learn tht from you now, at her age, then you have given her a gift beyond calculation. She is so fortunate! My son just moved from our home at 22, and since we homeschooled him, he was here 24/7 and is missed, has left a hole in a way. Yet he is doing so well, is so well placed and smart, I am so happy for him to begin a life separate from us. It is his time to fly and grow and be all that he can be, and now it is mine too! again.

galew said...

I just signed up for Medicare! Where did the years go? I still feel like I'm 35 on the inside.

About 5 years ago I read a book called "Sex and the Seasoned Woman". I had just become widowed and the book gave me a feeling of freedom. Age is an attitude.

Today, more than ever, I'm enjoying my life, my talents, my friends. I recently launched a new website which includes a section for seniors. www.living-on-the-cheap.com. Fifty is not yet a "senior" legally, but just wait.

I've connected with some people from high school I had not seen in 46 years. We're going to have a 50th Reunion Blast. It seems like yesterday.

I took up dancing again when I became widowed. I've made some good NEW friends. The last 1/3 of my life will be the best because I'm wiser, more experienced, more understanding, and more focused.

Lydia said...

First, congratulations on becoming a Blog of Note (which is how I found you, of course)!

Second, your profile is kinda thrilling for me because of the places you've lived. I was born and raised in Reno and grew up spending summers at Tahoe. My best girlfriend lived in Incline Village (before there were junior and high schools there so Incline kids were bussed down to Reno). She now lives in the Portland area, 40 miles away from where I've lived for over 20 years in the Willamette Valley. Also, I have half-brothers who live in Duluth and Mankato, Minnesota! Small world, eh?

Finally, at 58 I have to say that I am in a current evaluation of this stage. Unlike you, I did not have children. My mother always raved about how much she loved her 50s. For me they just are.....
I experienced enormous life-changes in my mid-30s that have basically informed my path afterward. Recently, in the last year, since beginning blogging, actually, I have experienced another shifting of focus, growth, excitement for what lies ahead, and peace with what is behind.

Sorry to go on and on. I know you have so many messages now. One of my favorite bloggers for the past year.....a blogging friend......was made a blog of note a few weeks ago. Her followers list went from around 32 to 416 last time I looked at the box! How thrilling!

LoF said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LoF said...

i'm going through my first major restructure (of course i'm rounding out my twenties). too bad my restructure doesn't qualify for bailout or stimulus funds!

Newsworthy said...

Life is so good at fifty. I have freedom to come and go as I please. I don't have to schedule around my children's schedule. My husband loves me, and I am madly in love in with him. If I was offered to go back to a younger age, I wouldn't turn it down in nano second! I worked hard to get here and damn it, I am enjoying it. I do 250 sit ups & 100 man push ups a day. I use elliptical machines for forty-five minutes to an hour. I train with weights. I have no time to complain about anything. I feel fabulous! Life is great at fifty!

Michelle Lambton said...

I also read Gail Sheehy's "Sex and the Seasoned Woman. I am only 45, but I have two daughters that fit into yours' ages. I deal in empty-nest feelings from a secluded brain: I am very recently re-married, have moved to a tiny rural community and have no phone! I have accidentally let go of the few friends I had, only to discover that I no longer have anything to appeal to that skim-latte-chic-social ladder climbing crowd. Making new friends at this age has been really trying! How's that for restructuring?! My mum says that if I am anything like her, I will go through this several more times. AACK!

L said...

True.
I had posted in one of my blogs about how the "empty nest" and the identity crisis of the twenties were almost the same....equally painful. But perhaps this time round we are a bit wiser.

Bronzy said...

My age is 33 years old, my life has stopped moving since I was 18 years old, I`m still trying to live my life again, though life doen`t worth living after all what happened and didn`t happen.
I`d rather die, I`m simply waiting.