Sunday, May 17, 2009

Resistance & Tolle



I've been reading Eckhart Tolle's "A New Earth" and one of the parts reminded me of childbirth. I had chosen to do the "Bradley Method" with my oldest daughter. Natural childbirth, with as little pain medication as possible. Not, by the way, a method that is for everyone. But something Tolle said brought back memories, and highlighted what I think he was trying to bring to light. And that is that the human mind is incredibly resilient, and strong. Once an understanding of how it works is illuminated, you can never go back.

The Bradley Method teaches you how to go into the pain, during childbirth. Using your mind to allow your body to do what it needs to do without resistance. And I can tell you - it works. I was able to literally control the pain by controlling my thoughts. Now if I was nudged out of my intense concentration, the pain would roll over me like a steam roller, thus I needed to stay fully invested in the work at hand.

Becoming aware of the ego, and how it uses emotion and thoughts to feed dysfunction, is the basis of Tolle's book. That incessant voice that is constantly being critical of self and others, creating whole scenarios of winners and losers, judging, manipulating, controlling, and competing to the point of making us miserable. These thoughts create our reality, drawing negativity and unhappiness to us.

So how does that relate to the Bradley Method?

By becoming aware of what my ego is doing, and learning to watch it from a distance, I can then become engaged in the process of awakening to the truth within. I begin to see how it is controlling and manipulating me. It is creating resistance to the work at hand, and that is to be mindful of how I respond to those inevitably painful and tricky situations that I will encounter in my life. Thereby not drawing more pain to myself through resistance and fear and unconscious responses. For what we resist, we strengthen. If I can do it in childbirth - it's possible to do in my life as well.

26 comments:

Phoebe Miriah Kirby said...

I've watched the natural births on some specials and I've always thought those women were the lucky ones, the ones with painless births by chance or by the build of their bodies.
They made it look so easy and carefree I wanted to do it as well. You are a strong woman if you can control the ego "go into the pain."
I definitely want to read that book and pass it along to friends. :)

Babies are a long way in the future for me, but I am open to interpretation.

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

What a good lesson to learn...and practice. The ego is a huge part of ourselves to try to take control of, but as taught correctly, can be overcome. I admire your childbirth method. Even though I would have loved to have tried, all 4 of mine were C-sections. That's a lot of pain to overcome! Great post...as always!

Marguerite said...

Very insightful post. I, also had natural births, using the "Bradley Method" with both of my children. Since my son weighed 10 1/2 lbs.,at birth, it was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do. I got through it by keeping my mind on the prize and not the pain. Positive thoughts are very powerful, indeed.

MzzLily said...

I had my daughter without any pain medication. I did learn to focus and breathe through the pain. It is a great analogy. Thanks for sharing. It is on my 'to someday read' list.

Marlene said...

I will need to read this..I agree witht his concept..the ego is something to be aware of when dealing with difficult situations..
I am no longer in the workplace
( International Sales) corporate world is a battlefield when it concerns the ego...its very hard to stay detached when everyone around you is functioning in fear and survival mode...Reading your entry brought vivid memories of how it used to be...and how amazingly similair some situations here in a small coastal town mimic this...Reading this and remembering was a good excercise for me today! Thank you

Jeff D'Antonio said...

Well, I can't comment on the childbirth part, but I just wanted to say I completely agree about the power of the human mind. Properly focused, the human mind is capable of so many things, things we haven't even discovered we're capable of yet. We do create our own reality based on our own perception of the world around us. That's why I think it's so important to keep a positive attitude about all things - negativity feeds on itself, and can lead us into an endless cycle of misery if we let it; likewise, positivity can have the opposite effect.

Nancy said...

I waas unable to choose what kind of birth I wanted as both my kids were born emergency style (pre-eclampsia) but I wish I had been able to. I want to read that book, I think I will go check it out at the library.

Elizabeth Bradley said...

I used the "Bradley method too!" And, like Marguerite, I used it when giving birth to a jumbo-sized baby, my son weighted 10lbs 9ozs. His head, (I will never forget), was 14 inches in circumference. Yikes! I had five children, no drugs, no episiotomies. A humorous sidenote: my husband's name is Bradley.

ellen abbott said...

Both my children were delivered by natural childbirth, no drugs. The mind is a power to be reckoned with. Thought is energy and the more thought, ie energy, you put into an idea, the more real it becomes.

Rain said...

Hmmm...the Bradley Method sounds like something that I'd be interested in too. I'll have to look that up, thanks for mentioning it!

Kathy's Klothesline said...

My mother was one of the most negative people I have ever known. She would anticipate all the worst case scenarios in her mind....to the point that she would actually make them happen. My biggest fear is that I will somehow become her. She was very difficult to be around, yet I would have horrible feelings of guilt for withdrawing from her. She was, after all, my mother and I was being a "bad" daughter by denying her the pleasure of my company. Very complicated. Just interesting that she seemed to be controlling her mind, but in such a negative way.

luksky said...

I have read most of Tolle's books. If you haven't yet, you might want to try Wayne Dyer, or Neale Donald Walsche's books too. At the moment I am reading The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz. Very interesting book alothough I'm sure some may not "get" it's content...somehow I think you would. :-)

Joanne said...

Mind over matter. Positive thinking, positive outlook, it's all so important. I try to remain positive in daily life, it's surprising how it does often take conscious focus to do so.

lolit said...

i agree to joan, mind over matter is a powerful tool to overcome any obstacles,although i have not experienced all the above method, all natural method and bore all the pain. This gave me a lesson to stop conceiving,lol. maybe i can share this to my future daughter in laws.

TheChicGeek said...

Neat post :) I agree, "the human mind is incredibly resilient, and strong." I believe when we put our minds to something we can overcome just about anything :)
Have a Happy Day!

Lisa said...

i have so enjoyed that book.

Jo said...

I think you have been reading my mind lately. :-) I have been feeling the same thing as you -- fighting my ego and the negativity that can sometimes creep in.

It is creating resistance to the work at hand... Oh yes. When we don't fight it, it is not as much of a threat, and we can move on.

Great post!

susan said...

My words of wisdom to myself for a long time have been, 'I may have been born to suffer but no to make my own'.

Lindz said...

You are one strong woman!

Cheryl said...

I love Eckert Tolle! I've been listening to the audio version of The New Earth for months now, getting something new from it with each listening. I believe that too, about the mind being able to control pain. It worked with these headaches I kept having last year. One day I just thought, no more! Et voila! No more headaches.

gulfjulie said...

Brilliant Blog!

I love Tolle, my favorite is "The Power of Now"....pick it up if you have not yet read it...

And I think the audio versions would be great too!

Butternut Squash said...

Agreed. Resistance to the inevitable seems only to increase the pain.

On the other hand, there are many causes for which I feel resistance is necessary, and productive. Civil Rights comes to mind.

I really enjoyed Tolle as well. Most of his ideas seem very Buddhist to me, I like the way he blends these ideas with Christianity.

All this week they are discussing spirituality on NPR http://www.npr.org/news/specials/2009/brain/. Something I know you would enjoy.

Erika C. said...

I love that book too. I had a planned home birth with my son and it was one of the most transformative experiences of my life. The midwife was Nancy Wainer and she and her team were amazing.

THanks for your thoughtful posts.

warmly,
Erika

nurturingwisdom said...

My husband and I attended classes for the Bradley Method, but our daughter was breech, so I had to have a C-Section. Ouch!

The training was wonderful.

Being transformed by the renewing of the mind is central to the new life a person who has accepted his/her new life in Christ, a person who has a new nature.
The progression of this new life is mentioned in 2Peter1:3-9. This transformation to love is quite a miracle. Every experience-good, bad, and horrible has worked for my good, to get me to the point of love.

Spiritual Journey said...

What a great concept! I've never thought of it that way. I thought I can pull a natural birth method my oldest one but I was just 7 cm dilated and I started screaming EPIDURAL! I guess my ego at that time won't just let go. I enjoyed Eckhart Tolle's book you mentioned. Very deep and introspective.

disa said...

伊莉討論區,伊莉論壇,sogo論壇,台灣論壇,plus論壇,plus,痴漢論壇,維克斯論壇,情色論壇,性愛,性感影片,校園正妹牆,正妹,AV,AV女優,SEX,走光,a片,a片免費看,A漫,h漫,成人漫畫,免費A片,色情網站,色情遊戲,情色文學,麗的色遊戲,色情,色情影片,同志色教館,色色網,色遊戲,自拍,本土自拍,kk俱樂部,後宮電影院,後宮電影,85cc免費影城,85cc免費影片,免費影片,免費小遊戲,免費遊戲,小遊戲,遊戲,好玩遊戲,好玩遊戲區,A片,情趣用品,遊戲區,史萊姆好玩遊戲,史萊姆,遊戲基地,線上遊戲,色情遊戲,遊戲口袋,我的遊戲口袋,小遊戲區,手機遊戲,貼圖,A片,A片下載,成人影城,愛情公寓,情色貼圖,情色,色情網站,色情遊戲,色情小說,情色文學,色情,aio交友愛情館,色情影片,臺灣情色網,寄情築園小遊戲,情色論壇,嘟嘟情人色網,情色視訊,愛情小說,言情小說,一葉情貼圖片區,情趣用品,情趣,色情漫畫,情色網