Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Duality Shift



My cosmology of evolution is that we are learning to shift from thinking through our brains, which are really just antennas, to thinking through our hearts, which is where we are actually connected to each other and to the the field of possibility. This field of possibility, which is my way of explaining the space between matter, is where all thoughts begin to take shape. It is where thoughts and intention begin to morph into reality. It is the fabric that connects us with each other and to all other manifestations in our reality. But it is our hearts that are the actual connectors. That's why our hearts synchronize with those we sleep next to, and why they can be detected in the brain waves of those with whom we are standing near.

We live in a world based on duality. Right - wrong. Good - bad. Love - hate. We judge everything. Our brains are designed to do this in order to help us survive. If we didn't have the mechanism to avoid things that could hurt us, we simply could not survive. So in many ways, we should be grateful for our dualistic view of life. Tiger chasing us - bad. Sweet tasting fruit - good. Cruelty - bad. Forgiveness - good. All of this comes from information our (antenna) brain brings to us. It is the radio that transmits messages to the body.

Now, what if we decide we are good with knowing right from wrong and good from bad and wish to evolve beyond a dualistic view of the world? How can we do this? After all, thinking from the heart is not anything we have been taught to do.

It is pretty basic, actually. It means you have to learn to suspend judgement. How, you say, can we learn to suspend judgement, and why would we want to do that if it is detrimental to survival?

It is because we are evolving beyond mere survival. Maybe we are even in the process of utilizing those other strands of "junk" DNA. Maybe, just maybe, we are in the process of evolution. Not Darwin's view of evolution, where it is survival of the fittest, but a new view of evolution that actually incorporates those "leaps" we don't know what to do with in Darwin's Theory.

Here is an example: Most of us have heard the story about the ship captain that abandoned ship before all the passengers were safely removed from the cruise ship that he was responsible for running aground near Tuscany, Italy. Our antennas are taking in information provided by the media, and we want to jump right into condemnation. After all, he was responsible and then he acted cowardly. Innocent people died. A pristine ecological environment is at risk - dolphins, whales, all at risk because of this man. All true if we are just using our brains to evaluate the situation. We feel anger, frustration, maybe even hate.

Now how would that look if we evaluated the situation through our heart? Maybe we see a man whose life has been shattered. A man full of fear, hurt, shame. He will never be a ship captain again. He will never have the prestige he once enjoyed as a captain of a cruise ship. But most of all - he knows that when put the test - he was unable to deliver as a captain under duress - to make good decisions based on sound judgement and to always put his passengers before his own well being. Not only has he been confronted with his own flaws - but the whole world knows them. Most of us will never have our flaws paraded before the entire world. Most of us will never screw up that badly. Most of us will not be responsible for the deaths of innocent people.

How does he look now? Does it change how you see this man? Do you still hate him? Or do you see a flawed human being, and feel some empathy?

It doesn't change what this man did. It changes you. And that is the only person you are responsible for changing. Suspending judgement is not easy. It takes practice. Last night I was watching Nightline and they had a segment on Casey Anthony - the young woman who was exonerated from killing her two-year-old daughter. It literally took all I had not to judge this woman and have all the corresponding feelings that go with that judgement. In fact, it is the emotions that are projected from feelings of judgement that go out into the world and create duality.

So try it for yourself. See how often you judge, then try to suspend it just once. Just let it be. Take in the information, then let it go. Don't attach emotion to what you are reading, hearing, watching, etc. Don't be manipulated by the media, advertising, politicians, etc.

It's a process, and it's not easy. But the outcome could be worth it.

13 comments:

DJan said...

So true, Nancy. So true. I feel differently about the ship captain after reading this. I'm still not able to get over what I see as a miscarriage of justice with Casey Anthony, but now I've got something to work on.

Thoughtful and insightful post. Thank you.

Kathryn said...

Hi Nancy,
I didn't follow the Casey Anthony thing at all (I'm Canadian, is that an excuse?). As for the captain, I have to say I thought of both sides all at once. Judgement and empathy...how could he, and oh god he must be so humiliated. Life as he knows it is over. not everyone passes the test when they're tested. He failed and everyone in the world knows it. And then, thank goodness I'm not responsible for thousands of lives...because I know how I'd like to think I'd act; bravery, nobility, self-sacrifice, grace under fire...but really, I wouldn't know until I was tested, and not everyone passes that test.
Not to say that I haven't thought of those who lost lives and family members. That was first, then judgement, and then empathy. Am I evolving?

Nancy said...

DJan - Me, too, when it comes to the Anthony case.

Kathryn - I do believe you are! Having empathy is thinking through the heart. And when the chips are down, we all like to think we are brave and strong - but what if we're not?

kate i said...

I find for myself that it's often a fine line between having a preference for a different experience and becoming judgemental. Judging others is really just a way of deflecting our own self judgements...(it's so much easier to point fingers outwards than to look within). I also feel that people and situations mirror back to us, our own self judgements...in this case...where do we judge ourselves for failing? Where have we let others down by not paying attention to important details and where have we let fear paralyze us from stepping up to the plate and being responsible.

You're right Nancy, it's all about love and most importantly self love...that's where it all begins. I think you've brought up something very important to be considered in this tragedy.

Nancy said...

Kate - You make an excellent point - very well said.

Brian Miller said...

truth for sure...we are a judgemental lot and i like the exercise of suspending judgement...i do try conciously but this feels like a new level of intension...

Whitney Lee said...

What a great post. I love the idea that we are evolving beyond the duality. In the last few years I've found that I am able to see both (or three or four) sides to a situation. This makes it easier for me not to judge people or to at least have more sympathy for their situation. Unfortunately, I have a bit of difficulty applying this when I'm involved, at least until I can gain a bit of distance from the initial emotions. I've also noticed that the actions or behaviors that I tend to judge most harshly are the ones that I am guilty of as well. It smacks of hypocrisy but also serves as a sort of behavioral highlighter-I simply look at what's making me angry in someone else and look for that behavior in my own life.

Nancy said...

Brian - Just becoming aware of how much we judge everything is a start, I think.

Whitney - You are already well on your way to seeing things clearly. I also use the mirror effect to see where I need to work on myself. Invariably, whatever I react to in others, I am guilty of myself. It's actually a really good way to see what you need to work on, I agree.

Reya Mellicker said...

As usual, you are thinking deep thoughts. I love that about you, Nancy.

A shift from thinking in terms of separateness to our relationships with each other is definitely an evolutionary act.

The brain is a lot more than an antennae, btw.

xx oo

Trish and Rob MacGregor said...

Great post, Nancy. Suspending judgment isn't ever easy. I've found that meditation makes it easier, though!

Natalie said...

Awesome post, Nancy. I am working on this as we speak. Synchro! xx

CrazyCris said...

I've been trying to suspend judgement for years, and I am a person who emphasizes a lot with others. I'd make a perfect devil's advocate 'cause I can usually argue both sides of the coin. But the funny thing is, I find it easier to suspend judgement for big cases like that Captain, than I do for small peccadillo that hit closer to home! :s So still working on that...

susan said...

That's excellent advice. The Buddhists remind us to remember every being may once have been our mother. It's just another way of reminding us to think from the heart.