Thursday, November 19, 2009

Purse shopping+husband = :-(


One of the very odd things about early "retirement" is that your husband comes with you when you go shopping. He would rather have pulled out his last hairs, by the roots, than join me on a shopping trip a year ago. He simply would have refused. His time was very precious to him back then.

I have a birthday coming up, and he kindly asked me what I would like, or what I would like to do for my birthday. I informed him that I wanted nothing more than a new purse this year. This sounded great to him. No worrying about the right size, color, or object for that matter. Just go buy a purse! Yay, he thought.

Macy's had a big sale today, so off we went to check out what they had to offer. Driving down to Reno from Lake Tahoe, we ran one errand and decided to split up - with me going to Macy's and him to REI, Lowes, and some other male-loved retailer. He asked when he should pick me up and I mentioned we needed to pick up my yarn that was being wound into balls by 5:00 - which gave us three hours. What!? His face registers extreme alarm! He was thinking a half hour! One hour at the most!

Needless to say, I had to set him straight.

A word of advice to my male blogging friends - if your wife, mother, sister, daughter, girlfriend, or grandmother says she needs to go bag shopping - be prepared. Do not try and rush her! You will only cause her to purchase one that will not do in the end, and only cause you another trip. So find someplace to settle, grab a snack, play with your I-Phone, bring your book along, whatever. But do not rush her!

It needs to be the right color for the season, it must hang the perfect distance from shoulder and fit snugly under her arm. Too high won't do - too uncomfortable - too low won't do - too uncomfortable. It must have the right and perfect opening - wide or narrow - it is a personal choice. Then it must have the right zippers, pocket for cell phone, additional inside pockets, and sturdy magnetic closures or other fun accessories. It requires that she do a pass through to see what is available. Then another pass to gather a few to take to the counter. Then she has to take everything out of her purse and put it into the new possibilities. Just to see how it hangs, how heavy it is, and what it looks like when she is carrying it. This is done with the saleslady urging her to buy the more expensive of the two or three. Which of course requires that she discuss this with other women standing nearby, who are engaged in the same activity. Comments and advice are appreciated, and exchanged.

You get the picture.

No, not to be done in half an hour. Not to be done in one hour. But less than three.

35 comments:

John Atkinson said...

Believe you me, I've learned not to rush my wife Renee shopping. She is known among her lady friends as being Miss Coordinated when it comes to handbags and outfits matching. I remember waiting outside T J Max for 3 hours while she made up her mind. Because I went in a few times she said I rushed her, which caused another trip back to the store the next day. Now when Renee ask me to go in a store with her I know she wants something extra with my blessings. I call this a shopping maneuver on her part because I always tell her to buy the item just to get back to the parking lot where I've learned to nap and wait without rushing her shopping.

Kathy G said...

I decided last night I needed a new black purse. I will be going by myself, though, so I can take all the time I need.

I think I can do it in well under three hours, though :-)

Gaston Studio said...

I need to go purse shopping with you so that I don't choose the wrong one and leave it in my closet because I didn't take the time I needed. And I'm a girl!

ellen abbott said...

Boy, I had no idea it was so difficult to buy a purse. Makes me really glad I don't carry one. Now finding women's pants with back pockets? that's difficult.

GYPSYWOMAN said...

too too funny! and reminds me so of two of my daughters - the two who live here - yes, there's macy's here - BUT, there are the designer outlets, most importantly - by all the purse gods that are holy, lisa and heather win the prize! when they say they're going down to the outlets and want me to come along, i bring a couple of books, a sack lunch, bottled water - and extra cd's - oh, yeah, and i stay in my comfy car, push my seat back, open the sun roof and windows and prepare for a time of solitude!

neat post - as always!

GYPSYWOMAN said...

and HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!

DJan said...

I would NEVER DREAM of taking my husband shopping with me. We live in two different worlds as far as shopping is concerned. But I've always used a backpack instead of a purse, and even that takes a long time to find the right one. A few years ago I decided I should carry a purse and now have five in my closet, none of which I use, because I love my backpack...

luksky said...

I have been purse shopping for over 6 months due to those circumstances you spoke of. I am not left alone in a store long enough to make a proper selection.

scarlethue said...

Haha totally agree. I'll shop for weeks when I need a new purse. I can't stand the "bottomless pit" purses, but it also has to be big enough to carry all my stuff (wallet, checkbook, iPhone, brush, hand lotion, mints, make-up bag, bandaids, cort-aid, visine... you get the picture).

Brian Miller said...

advise well taken...there are a few stores that have taken pity on us guys and put couches by the dressing rooms...for this i am grateful. smiles.

happy birthday!

JC said...

So true ... If I rush a purse purchase I will continue to wonder if I should have gotten the other one.

Bon'O said...

What? No "Show & Tell"? Couldn't agree more about how SPECIFIC the specifics of the right handbags are. For me, the best are usually Fossil brand.

Mental P Mama said...

LOL. It takes such a long time to educate them, doesn't it?

Josephine said...

Word!

Nancy said...

John - LOL! I think you and my husband have much in common.

Kathy - Good luck! It took me over an hour - but then I had started looking in Portland last week, so I knew sort of what I was looking for.

Gaston - Yep, I have several of those.

Ellen - You are a wonder woman! How do you schlep all your stuff?

Gypsy - An outlet would have been wonderful. Why didn't I think of that last week in Portland? Reno doesn't have any that I know of. Thank you for the B-Day greeting!

DJan - Mine likes to go along so he can do other things - usually it works because I don't shop much - but purse shopping is a different ballgame. I tried the backpack once but found that didn't work too well for me. It has to be just the right backpack, right? LOL!

luksy - It's hard when they tag along! My husband ran his errands and then waited in the car.

scarlethue - I know exactly what you mean!

Brian - Those are nice, aren't they.

JC - Yep. Or it goes in the closet...

Bon'O - I like the fossil brand as well. And Tianello. This brand is a new one for me - Makowsky. A new color, other than black, for winter - "Brandywine"

Mental - Yes, it does.

Josephine - Word?

Jeninacide said...

That sounds like QUITE the purse choosing ritual! I don't know WHY he would want to be a part of it. What was he thinking?!

Pam said...

Exactly! My husband would never dream of going purse shopping with me. Just as I would never, ever go shopping at a hardware store with him.

Nancy said...

Jenin - He was thinking he would run his errands while I purchased this purse. But his errands and this particular purchase had a time differential.

Pam - I know what you mean. I used to hate going to Home Depot with him while he agonizes over "couplings."

Star said...

(Laughing) oh so true, I can identify with all of that. I love to have my husband with me when I shop but it is a bit restrictive isn't it and you are always aware of the clock ticking...I hate buying a new handbag or a purse for my money because it is so HARD to get the right one. Just like you said, it has to be just right in all ways. Nice when you get one though.
Blessings, Star

Elizabeth Bradley said...

Thanks a lot, now I want to go shopping for a new purse. And I might need some shoes to match! ;-]

Nancy said...

Star - I see you have the same problem! :-)

Elizabeth - Don't take your husband along - shoes and a handbag might send him over the edge!

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

I am sure that my DH is undeniably pleased that I have NEVER taken him purse shopping!

Emom said...

Oh,....you are so funny...but absolutely honest and "spot-on"...smiles.

Brenda Susan said...

Perfect! Yes, men just don't get it do they? great post!!

GooseBreeder said...

Ah Ellen,womens' pants with back pockets,now you're talking my lifestyle!Clothes with as many pockets as mens', forget the bags, who has 3 hours to spend in a shop!? I love bags as much as the rest of you but you grow to love other things better sometimes.

Deborah said...

I laughed and laughed at the title of this post. Shopping with my mate is like going through a toll booth - in, pay, out.

Happy Birthday to you!

PS I will be in touch with you by email. Thank you.

Nancy said...

Alicia - No doubt!

Emom - Silly, I know. :-)

Brenda - They think you can just grab one and go -

Goose - Ah yes, some of us don't even carry purses, true. I do have a teeny tiny wallet that just goes in my pants pocket on occasion. There is something to be said for pockets.

Deborah - Good analogy. Thanks, and whenever you feel like talking, I'm available.

Trish and Rob MacGregor said...

FUNNY! One simple purse. Do. Not. Rush. Me.

SquirrelQueen said...

I was at the Macy's sale yesterday, alone. My hubby works but I think even after he retires there is no way I could drag him to a mall.

I broke down and bought two, the prices were great and I couldn't decide.

BTW, I saw you on another blog and decided to pop over for a visit and just kept reading.

The Road to Here

Nancy said...

Trish & Rob - Exactly!

SquirrelQueen - Thanks for stopping by. Two! How funny. Yes, the prices were great weren't they?

Marguerite said...

Rule #1 of life, Never take a man shopping with you!!! The few times that I did, ended up in total shopping failure and one time, ruined the relationship for good! It does take time to find the right purse and may even involve going to several stores, so who needs to be rushed? Have a great weekend!

Tulika said...

LOL


Too funny.

Loved reading it. :)))

Deborah said...

Just got this in my inbox from Urban Word of the Day and thought of your post.

'Manchair : A man chair is the chair that men sit in while their partner is shopping for long periods of time. They can be found in almost any clothing or shoe store. What can we, as men do while our gf's or wives are shopping, we can sit in a man chair.

Pat said...

Oh no - my husband is just the OPPOSITE. He feels it's HIS BUSINESS to tell me what kind of purse to buy! It drives me crazy! He thinks I should buy one of those "backpack" purses because I have a bad back. What? And sacrifice style? Get serious! And why is he in my business ANYWAY! I'd prefer he'd get lost for awhile and then just avail himself to carry all my packages. Now THAT would be a perfect day!

AngelMay said...

LOL! You are so right. A good bag is just hard to find.